a friend asked me a couple of times how do i feel on my birthday. honestly... i was rather numb. to my friends who know me... birthday is a BIG deal for me... or at least used to be... i'm even particular on friends wishing me on the dot... as in at 12am of 8th Sept.... and again on 11.20am on 8th Sept, my birth TIME! since 1 year old... not that i can remember, but thanks to photos... my parents threw birthday parties for me each and every year even up to today... Well at least in a much smaller scale in the past 3 years...
as this year's birthday draws new, honestly.. i wasnt even excited. pretty unusual. instead, i was in an unusual reflective mood. reflecting abt my life.. my family, my friends, my job, my christian walk... since last year's birthday, each of these areas in my life have changed a great great deal. good and bad... joyful and painful... sounds dramatic? yeah... i think i've been dramatic all my life! it seems everything that happens in my life though small in the eyes of other people, yet it seems like the biggest drama for me. dramatic, impulsive, emotional... these adjectives are almost said to be like synonyms to me...
so, how should i feel right now? contended i should be... i'm blessed by a great job! nice and helpful colleagues. stable and see myself growing in the company. family members whom i have grown close over the past months. mainly because i spend more time at home! haha. blessed by many good friends and a bunch of girls who accepts and appreciates me as i am.
but.... how do i really feel? honestly... still kinda numb... the days are just passing so quickly... everyday going thru the motions of the day. come and go... and at times even pretending as if everything is good and rosy. well.. is it not? hmm.. i choose to believe it is... at least for now...
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That's a lot of birthday celebrations you have there!!
Haha....welcome to the late twenties and beyond club!!! NOW you know how we feel on our own birthdays..... Nothing much really. A little bit warm inside usually.
Looks like you have grown up wor! But tell you what.... I do believe that this is a season to spend time with our families. Only a season lah. And then it will be out of that comfort zone and into new territory once again. Just enjoy the moment.
I am also in a state of constant reflection and wonder that I am like in another world!
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